I have had something on my heart for several weeks and just can't seem to let it go. I am not sure why, probably because it was very hurtful and I am still quite upset about it.
A few weeks ago, I was told by a family member to stop having kids. It really upset me and I tried to laugh it off and said that Kevin and I have always said we wanted 2-3 kids.
My question is why should it matter if we wanted to have 2 or 3 or15? It shouldn't matter to anyone but us. It's not like we want 15 kids but if we did, why should it matter to anyone besides us. Kevin and I are good parents, you can ask any of our friends, family, or church family and they will tell you we are good parents. We never ask anyone for anything for our kids. Our children are well taken care of, could never want for much and even if they did, would that be bad? I will admit that having another child will mean that we won't be able to go out to eat as often or have movie dates as much, but that is a sacrifice that we were willing to make and knew that we would have to cut back on our frivolous spending more which we really don't do a whole lot of that to begin with. We are really responsible people and always have been.
Back to the original topic and to answer some questions that we have be asked. Yes, this child was planned and very much wanted. Yes we are excited and can't wait for it to get here. My momma always taught me that if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all.
What is your take on it? Is 3 kids too many? I know if we were only allowed to have 2 kids per family, I wouldn't have been born and neither would many people I know.
Mama Jean.
11 years ago
3 kids isn't too many! It's probably too many for us, given the issues that we're always going to have with our oldest, but 3 is fine. 4 is fine. 8 is fine, if you can provide for them. I don't know about 20, but I don't know if there is some sort of arbitrary cut-off.
ReplyDeleteSome people think that kids need expensive clothes, fancy vacations, and lots of lessons and activities in order to live well and be happy and grow up right, and if having another child means the difference between getting those things and having to do without, then they'd sooner not have another child.
Whichever family member that was needs to mind their own. Kinda like my sister saying to her just-married friend that visiting my children is a great form of birth control. Because my sister has no filter, and no class. Just like that family member of yours.
UMM yeah, well i guess you already know my take on this since I have 5! I have heard this time and time again, "don't have any more", "aren't you done yet", "your not having anymore are you" and so on and so forth. I think how many kids you have is a personal matter. One couple might only be able to handle one child and another couple may be perfectly able to handle 12. I think God will let you know. If it is right with you and with God that is all that matter.
ReplyDeleteThis is just the same as saying 1 kid isn't enough! It's silly. Who cares how many a couple has if you can support them and love them and all that good stuff. People need to get a life.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm.... I'm not so sure 3 is enough! *lol* I had four.
ReplyDeleteBut really, how many kids you and your husband decide to have is up to you.
I used to teach a home school karate class. I found it somewhat comical that the pregnant Mom who already had 7 children could always be on time with all 7 children in tow - with hair neatly brushed and shoes on and the Mom with only two chilren was always late because the little one lost a shoe or the older one couldn't find her karate belt - or SOMETHING. It just proves that some Mom's are quite capable of managing large families while others have all they can do with their small ones.
I am so sorry that inconsiderate person felt the need to pry into your personal business. In my opinion there is no magical "right" number of children. I have 3 and am working on #4 is that alot...to some people yes, to me who has 29 aunts and uncles and 51 first cousins NO. I think as you said, this baby was planned, you are well able to support it and you are good parents so people just need to live and let live..
ReplyDeleteHoly crap. That person needs to close their own legs and not breed thus concentrating their stupidity and uppity attitude to themselves.
ReplyDeleteHow dare somebody else tell you how many children to have, to presume to tell you how to live your life and what to do with it and your body.
I'd have two more just to piss em off. Plus you do make pretty little ones ;)
There is no such thing as too many children until you and your SO decide you have had enough.
Course I do think "Octomom" and her 14 kids is a bit overdoing it......